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Scratch
Scratch & Grounder vs Crow & Tom Servo is a What If? Death Battle created by Spelunkydunkey and is Season 1 Episode 5 in his series. Description Sonic vs MST3K! Which dynamic duo of robots will scrap the other? Can the pilots of The Satellite of Love defeat Dr Robotnik's clumsy minions? Introduction Wiz: Brotherly love. A term used to describe two people's close bond. Boomstick: And these here gadget gangs take that to a whole new level. Wiz: Like Crow & Tom Servo, the wisecracking widgets of Mystery Science Theater Boomstick: And Scratch & Grounder, servants of Dr Robotnik. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Crow & Tom Servo Wiz: Sometimes bad movies have to be made fun of. Many people do this as a pastime but most infamous of all are Crow & Tom Servo. Boomstick: But, things weren't always like this. In the futuristic time of Next Sunday AD, A man named Joel worked for Gizmonic Institute. Wiz: Things took a dark turn when his bosses decided to shoot him into space and force him to watch terrible movies. Boomstick: Alone, Joel decided to use the parts to stop the experiment in order to create his robot friends. Two of those were Crow & Tom Servo. (We hear whirring and screeching coming from a speaker.) Wiz: Incoming transmission! Crow: Did someone call us? You know, we can help you out a bit. Tom Servo: Yep, free of charge! Boomstick: Alright then. Being trapped in space, these walking tin cans have plenty of ammunition. Like their Slot Cars that can travel at 300 scale mph, Crow's detachable arms, toy gun. Tom even has a GODDAMN JETSKI! Tom Servo: Ah, the SS Servo. I remember it like tomorrow. Let's not forget my baseball head and Crow's bat and ball Crow: Yeah, and the time Joel smashed a hole in the ship. As well, we have our Water Juggling Paddles and our Snaction modes. Wiz: Tom clearly has more dangerous powers like flight, teleportation, time warping and cloning. Boomstick: But, Crow has his telekinetic abilities as well as the power to summon Timmy. Tom Servo: Don't you DARE mention Timmy! He's the guy that dismantled Cambot and took the whole crew to banish! Crow: Yeah! But what we can mention is our potent palliative, the Killer Shrew Brew. Wiz: With a few drops of the cocktail, it can knock out humans like Joel so imagine what a full slurp would do. Boomstick: Where can a guy get some o' that? Anyways with such powerful artillery, they certainly have their feats. They've stopped Timmy, survived all of the movies they watched and even got mangled by a laser cannon before crashing back into the ship. Wiz: But their greatest feat is when they survived a crash back to Earth without a scratch. To enter into the Earth's orbit, the crash would've been the same force as a small meteor impact. Crow: Yep, but even bots like us have our weaknesses. Tom Servo: He's right. We can be a bit childish, don't always get along and we still have to eat. Boomstick: But the f***ing weirdest fault is that when Tom's about to die, Crow goes into an UNSTOPPABLE WILLIAM SHATNER IMPRESSION that can only be stopped by someone else! Crow: That's true. Alrighty, Wiz & Boomstick, we'll be going now and we may see you again after the fight. Tom Servo: Ta-ta now! (We hear the screeching and whirring once again.) Wiz: Well then, I don't think we can forget that now. Boomstick: Even with years of therapy. The two bots are the most powerful wisecracking robots you've probably ever seen. (Insert Crow's line from Tibby, Oh Tibby.) Scratch & Grounder (Insert Sonic Colors Aquarium Park) Wiz: For every hero, there is a villain. The same can be said for Dr Ivo (Eggman) Robotnik. Boomstick: I mean, the guy's threatened Sonic so many times he's practically a walking ransom note. But we're not here to talk about Eggman, no. We're here to talk about the moronic robot minions he built. (Cue AoStH Dr Robotnik's Theme) Wiz: Scratch & Grounder may look like nothing, but they have quite the arsenal. The most common of these being Scratch's peck and Grounder's drill arms. Boomstick: Which can double as hands, ropes, boxing gloves, laser guns, a telephone, rocket engines, helicopter blades and gas guns! Christ, this guy matches Scrooge's cane when it comes to multitasking. Wiz: Scratch can also turn his hands into scissors and has a telescopic neck that extends and retracts. The robotic chicken has a drawstring, sleeping gas and a handheld laser pistol. Boomstick: What don't they have? Anyways, Grounder totes a Swiss Army Knife, is a user of Toon Force and even knows Ninjutsu! But we aren't done with Grounder yet. Wiz: Enter the Stupid & Genius Chips. Once switched on, they will either make Grounder a supergenius or make other enemies stupider than Grounder. Boomstick: Damn that's cool! They have their feats too, you know. They've successfully captured Sonic and Tails many times, worked for Mammoth Mogul, guarded Breezy's Casino without too much trouble. Heck, they even lasted 17 seconds against a blood-lusting, full-powered Sonic. Wiz: But even with these feats, they have their faults. They can be blown up pretty easily, can get intoxicated by liquor and Grounder smokes cigarettes. Not to mention Scratch has an IQ of 40 while Grounder's is 25. But their worst weakness? They argue with each other most of the time. Boomstick: But BY GOD, you do not want to get on their bad side. "This nasty playground vandalism will get us on 'Lifestyles of the Sick and Twisted' for sure!" Prefight Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLLLLLLEEEE! Fight (Cue Spongebob Production Music Me For You.) We see the outside of The Satellite of Love hovering in space. Inside, we see Crow & Tom Servo enjoying a bowl of RAM chips. Crow: Servo, you think something's off today? Something missing? Tom Servo: Nah, we're fine. After Tom said that, an earthquake hit the ship while clanking can be heard to the left. Both bots turn to the direction of the commotion. Crow: Seems we got company. Better check on em. The hatch of the ship opens and we see a Chicken and a robot with drill hands in front of a round ship with a fashionable moustache. The Death Egg. Scratch: We're terribly sorry, but any competitors of the Death Egg shall be terminated for Dr Robotnik's pleasure. Tom Servo: I think you have the wrong ship, guys. Can we talk this out? Grounder: YOU'RE the wrong one, Bowl Head. Scratch: The both of you will be coming with us. Dead or alive. (Insert Sonic CD Japan/Pal Boss) FIGHT Tom leaped at Grounder, punching him a few times before being sent flying into a wall with the bot's boxing gloves. Crow braced for Scratch as he darted at the yellow robot beak first. The attack knocked a chunk off of Crow's net. Tom teleported to where Crow was and headbutted Scratch, sending the chicken to the ground. Grounder: Catch this, Barrel Body! Grounder threw his rope at Tom Servo, landing in the middle of his dome. Using his toon strength, Grounder easily threw Tom behind him, ripping off his dome. Grounder tried to throw a punch with his normal hands, but Tom Servo teleported to Crow and put his baseball head on. Tom Servo: Let's see how you do against this, bot-for-brains! Crow fired two balls at both enemies. One hit Scratch but the other was impaled by Grounder via his drill arm. He then spun it so hard it flew off and close by Crow, snapping the bat in two. (Cue Mario Paint Fly Swatter) Crow: Uh oh! New plan, don't do what I did. Tom teleported behind the bots to regain his dome and to flank them. Grounder threw a boxing glove at Crow, tearing his arm off quite easily and leaving a crater in the wall. Grounder: Ha! What will you do now? Crow picked up his arm with the only remaining one on his body. Crow: This. Crow launched a series of swipes at Grounder, sending him back. The armless bot then put the dismembered limb back in it's socket. Grounder: YIPES! Scratch, take care of scrawny over there. I'll deal with Gumball Gob! Scratch blitzed Crow with a series of pecks, making him resemble a fine Swiss Cheese. Grounder, on the other hand, set off a flurry of Ninjutsu kicks and punches, landing Tom into a wall. Crow shuddered in a corner while Scratch pulled out his scissor hands. (Cue Yoshi's Island Bowser Fight) Scratch: Any last words before I scramble your sensors? Crow: A little off the top? Scratch: No. As soon as Scratch said that he clamped the scissors together, decapitating Crow. His lifeless body fell to the cold ground of the Ship as he slowly deactivated. Remaining Combatants: * Scratch * Grounder * Tom Servo Grounder: Come over here, Scratch. I think I've found a coward! Tom sulked following his best friend's death. Scratch: Oh, what happened? Did your friend just die in the hands of Dr Robotnik just like hundreds of other 'innocent' people? Hearing this, Tom finally snapped. This showed a darker side to the bot. He leapt onto Scratch, slashing into the machine's cracks. Grounder quickly used his fists to push Tom back into the wall. After this, Servo shook violently as though he was trying to imitate a jackhammer. Thinking he was about to self destruct, both bots held each other and braced for impact. (Insert Doctor Who Theme of choice. Optional) We see a sped up, reversed version of the moments following up to Scratch & Grounder's redemption. (Cut out music) We cut back to the bots holding each other once again. After the time warp, they push both of them off to find an alive Crow standing right in front of them. Remaining Combatants: * Scratch * Grounder * Tom Servo * Crow Scratch: What the? Well, you won't last long after this! Scratch hovered over Grounder's head and flipped a switch which activated the Genius Chip. Tom Servo: Crow. Snaction. Now. After Tom said this, Crow stumbled into another room to find the Snaction set while Scratch finally activated the chip. Grounder crackled for a while before fully transforming into Genius Grounder. (Cue Vivaldi - Spring) Grounder: Sir Thomas Servo, you shall definitely perish in this duel of the minds. Isn't that right, my faithful companion Scratch? Scratch: Yep, looks like it's time to scrap the Servo! (Cue Spongebob Production Music Grass Skirt Chase) Crow relentlessly searched the cupboards of the ship in order to find Snaction as Scratch dashed towards Tom. After a few seconds of rummaging, he had found the set. Crow burst into the room and threw the set towards Tom Servo. The small bot teleported to Crow and the two swapped on their ninja outfits that were basically just black rags with holes in them. Grounder: Fellow users of Ninjutsu? Three can play at that game, chaps. Crow: No, we're not ninjas. We're just glorified black towel- OW! (Cue GAoBaM The Waterfall) Grounder had launched a combo of punches at Crow before throwing him down Judo style. The green genius then took to the sky with a helicopter blade in one hand and a laser gun in the other as Tom did the same. On ground, Crow fought Scratch using the Pixie Staff as the airborne artillery clashed for the first time. Tom threw three Ninja Throwing Cookies at Grounder. The first one knocked him square in the face and the others were shot in midair. Grounder: You can't stay here forever you turtle-necked twit! Tom Servo: Neither can you. After this, Tom threw the Everlasting Octogompstomper at the propellor, causing it to jam and the blade to come clean off. Grounder fell to the floor head-first, causing both the Genius and Stupid Chips to be destroyed in the process. But where did the helicopter blade go? (Stop Music) The blade hit Scratch's arm, tearing off his hand. Thinking quickly, the chicken pulled out his drawstring and fastened the hand back on. Scratch: Ha! You're not stopping me anytime now! (Cue Sonic CD Stardust Speedway Bad Future) Crow got out his Slot Car and the remains of the baseball bat. Scratch: I jinxed it, didn't I? The wisecracking robot began to joust at Scratch, aiming for his head. Crow managed to hit the head, but the bot's head recoiled and pecked him, sending Crow into a wall. Tom Servo: Don't worry, I'll avenge you! And with that, Tom got into his faulty slot car and tried to launch at Scratch but to no avail. Using this chance, Grounder picked up the car and threw it at Crow's torso. (Cue Ed, Edd n Eddy Sumo Sound Effect) (Cue Kirby Triple Deluxe Masked Dedede) Tom Servo: Crow, whip me up a Killer Shrew, I'll take care of em. After saying this, Crow stumbled back into the other room as Tom dodged and weaved through the opponent's attacks. Scratch poked through the boundaries and extended his neck near Crow, busy at work. Scratch: What you doing there, Dingbot? Crow took his toy gun and pistol-whipped Scratch, making him retract his neck back into his body Just when he thought the bot would never return, Crow handed him the brew and quickly jogged away from the scrap scene. Tom took a swig of the liquor before leaping onto Grounder quite easily and beating him senseless. He then tipped all the contents into the robot's mouth and flew away. Grounder convulsed and collapsed into a coma. Scratch: Wow, what a way to go out. That dumbbot's such a loser, even his death sucks! Tom Servo: You REALLY wanna see a good way to go out? Tom went into another room, arriving back with his jetski. He then crushed Grounder using it, oil oozing from every nook and cranny. After a few moments, Tom moved it away to show the finished product, a mess of metal and wires. Remaining Combatants: * Scratch * Tom Servo * Crow (Cue Sonic Heroes Casino Park Zone) Scratch: YOU PINT-SIZED, PANSY PRICK! YOU KILLED GROUNDER! I WANTED TO DO THAT HONOUR FOR DR ROBOTNIK TO PROMOTE ME! Scratch got out his Laser Pistol and shot both bots. One on the left of Crow's chest, the other in the centre of Tom's dome. Crow: Hey, watch it! You'll shoot your eye out, kid! The robot chicken got hold of Tom and threw him to one side then punched Crow multiple times in the gut before tossing him next to Servo. Scratch: WHY WON'T YOU TWO DIE!? Tom hastily pulled himself up and walked towards Scratch who cut off his dome like Grounder did and chucked him with all his force into the main room's table. (Cue Doctor Who OST I Am The Doctor) Tom Servo: Why? Simple. You weren't built for us. Servo puts on his baseball head and charges to Scratch head-first, pinning the machine to the ground. Tom Servo: We're clearly a superior model. Crow and Tom topple the debris of the fight onto Scratch's head and limbs so that he cannot get back up. Tom Servo: And finally? The talking robot creates a plethora of clones. Tom Servo: You were just playing chicken. The clones slowly edge closer to Scratch as he is forced to watch his own demise. Scratch: Anxious Woah, buddy. I was joking around most of the time. Can we please call this off or what? One of Tom's clones rips open a wound in Scratch's chest Scratch: Oh god. Okay then, you do you. Could you not please? The clones rip out Scratch's chips as they devour his inner workings. Scratch lets out one pathetic weep for help before his servers finally shut down. Remaining Combatants: * Tom Servo * Crow Crow: Alright then, about time. Uh, Tom? What are we gonna do with the clones? Tom Servo: Relax, we can just send them off to the ship they came from. If they can take out a troop with ease, I'm pretty sure they'll go far. KO! The remaining scraps of the bots are used to repair Crow & Tom as well as fuel the ship. Crow & Tom are seen eating waffles to celebrate their victory as the clones march towards the Death Egg. Results (The crackling and whirring is heard one last time) Tom Servo: I knew we'd beat these chumps. Isn't that right, Crow? Crow: Yep. Go on, show em how we made these guys into tin foil. Wiz: While Scratch & Grounder held the advantage in strength and overall combat experience, they were bested in durability, intelligence and larger arsenal Boomstick: But Wiz, what about the Genius and Stupid Chips? Wiz: Although they did stand a chance with them, the chips could be damaged, leaving them useless. Boomstick: Yep, no matter what the pair could throw at them, it could get negated. Scratch & Grounder have laser guns. Wiz: Crow & Tom have tanked stronger laser cannons from escape pods. Crow & Tom have the Killer Shrew. Boomstick: Scratch & Grounder have been intoxicated before. Looks like the bot's riff of them made Scratch's sides split. Wiz: The Winners are Crow & Tom Servo. Strengths and Weaknesses Crow & Tom Servo * + Larger Arsenal * + Smarter Without the Genius Chip. * + Durability * + Better Team * + More Supernatural Powers * + More Competent * = Deadly Arsenal * - Smaller * - Weaker * - Less Combat Experience Scratch & Grounder * + Larger * + Stronger * + More Combat Experience * = Deadly Arsenal * - Smaller Arsenal * - Dumber Without Genius Chip * - Less Durable * - Worse Team * - Less Supernatural Powers * - Incompetent Did You Agree With The Results? Yes No Undecided No, But I Understand How Crow & Tom Won Which Is Better? Sonic MST3K Both Are Equal Next Time Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Bond, James Bond. James Bond vs Green Hornet Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:'Robot' Themed Death Battles Category:"Team on Team" themed Death Battles Category:Joke Death Battles Category:Two-on-Two themed Death Battles Category:'Video Games vs TV Shows' themed Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:Spelunkydunkey Category:Spelunkydunkey Season 1 Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2018